Petronas Carigali Miri Part 4

My life is full of plans. I plan my schedules for tomorrow before I sleep at night. When I got the news that I'm going to work in KLCC upon my graduation, trust me people, I've prepared a set of long-term planning. One of them is to take a part time class to obtain a diploma in the makeup artistry. Well, as you can see, it slipped away just like that. Some other time maybe....

The offer to work in Miri kinda give a significant impact to my perception. Sometimes, it makes me feel so scared to plan things so seriously. My latest me is "Ok, we see what happens first" instead of the old me who always predict the future and plan for it. So when people asked about my future plans, I was stucked with no rigid answers.

Yesterday, I was having a chat with a friend (x-utpian as well who's currently working with Petronas in Trg) He just knew about my placement in Miri and he did ask me this question "Ko amik PE (petroleum exploration) ek masa final semester?"

And I said I've never taken any of the petroleum subjects. Mine was pure bulding construction (4+0). And he said "Tak aci!!" Then I came to know that most people out there (especially men) are longing to have my position. There are a few of them who appeal to change their positions to Well Integrity Engineer and as far as I concern, one of them has managed to get the position already. He said that it is a great position.

Hmmm... I don't feel quite good about it. God knows what I want in life. I don't live to work, I just work to live. As I used to say, I don't dream a superb position in my career. I don't have any ideas what my position is going to be. But in my opinion, great job requires a great commitment. I know my potential, Petronas can have all my commitments but the issue is, do I really want this?

They say this position might require me to go to the offshore a lot. Is it true? If yes, again, I'm having an issue with the things that I love to do with the things that I have to do. But, I don't think it's appropriate to say this. It's so early. Maybe the best thing I can do is experience it first instead of talking crap with a blank head. So enough saying. I'm going to Miri and work happily there. Kene belajar bersyukur, tak dapat keje, nak keje. Dah dapat keje banyak songeh pulak kan? Huhu....

Working is not the point anymore. I've set up my mind that Miri is going to be my one. The point is the PLAN. I'm scared of planning. Last night, I got the offer that might bring me back to Semenanjung but I'm so scared to decide because I don't dare to plan. I'm scared to plan my marriage too. I'm having a conflict with my priority. I've lost one priority (makeup) and I need time for readjustment if I'm about to lose another priority in life.

I know the reason. I'm scared of planning because I'm scared of disappointment. Risk is all around right and walk away is not an option. I must build a strength to face it. But not now. My brain needs to be defragmented first. So for the time being, I stop rowing. I'm just throwing away the oars and let the tides bring my boat....


5 comments:

bijoux February 8, 2008 at 11:26 PM  

kunaz, setahu aku. keje upstream ni mmg challenging. aku tak triime pet dlu pon sbb aku tak dpt!! ciskek la kau. hehe. the thing that u should not be worried about is that kau selaku client. jd bab tdo kat plaform ni well taken care of. and you will get propper sleep, sume2 lah. jgn risau. takat g offshore sket2 je aku rase. sume untuk meluaskan ilmu pengetahuan kau. im sure u will be fine. insyaAllah.

bende2 len tu.. aku tak brani komen because, all plans are just plans in the end kan. we will never know how it will b at the end of the day.

kunaz February 10, 2008 at 11:32 PM  

waahhh kin! tq sgt2 atas nasihat ko yg pjg lebar tu. it helps a lot!

jengae February 11, 2008 at 7:54 PM  

aneh oh kunaz.. same cam aku aneh. dapat benda yg tidak dimahui. hohohoo

marilah menjadi aneh dan adapt. baiklah

sekian.

kunaz February 11, 2008 at 11:31 PM  

yeah mari meng-adapt! i'm getting more excited dh ni. u shud too! =D

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